Monday, November 16, 2015

Do This. Please.

I need to do a little straight shooting about a subject.  Some of you might wonder why I'm taking on this topic, and others will be relieved that someone finally spoke out.  Mirror spit.  Yep, I said it. Mirror spit, mirror spit, mirror spit.  It's not easy to talk about, but it needs to be addressed.  It happens.  We all do it. We brush.  We spit.  We spray the mirror.  Our kids are the worst offenders. Flossing also produces mirror spit...but please, floss.  Don't skip flossing because you might cause mirror spit.  But, for crying out loud, wipe off the mirror spit!  It's nasty.

In keeping with my "Do this, you'll feel better" series, I'm challenging you to take a good look at those mirrors.  Do they have mirror spit?  Have you gotten used to looking through the cloud of spit at your reflection?  Well, you shouldn't have.  Shame on you.  That's gross.  

It takes less than two minutes to remedy this dilemma. In the bathroom that my kids use this problem needs remedied daily.  Yes, they can clean it off themselves.  No, they do not think this is as big of a problem as I do, so they don't clean it themselves.  They think I'm lame and that I overreact to the spit.  I think they're messy and would live like pigs if I didn't intervene.  We're at an impasse.  

Here's what I do to keep up on it:  I regularly change the hand towels in the bathrooms.  When I take an old towel down I wet a corner of it and wipe down the mirror.  Then I use the dry side to dry the mirror. That's it.  It doesn't streak, and it gets that nasty spit off the mirror.  No Windex.  No sponges. No paper towels.  Just a simple wipe off when I'm changing out towels.  If Windex is more your thing, go for it.  

You might be thinking, "what's her problem? It's just a little spit, who cares. I can see why her kids think she overreacts."  First, simmer down.  Second, I promise that if you clean off your mirrors you'll feel better and understand what I'm talking about.  And if someone could convince my kids that they, too, would feel better, that'd be great...  

Friday, October 30, 2015

Do This: You'll Feel Better

I'm thinking I should be making a list of all the things I'm not getting done this week, lest you think I have it all pulled together.  Which would be total hog wash, as I am just faking "pulled togetherness" like the rest of you.  At least I'm admitting it.  So, here's what I'm not getting done this week: Bathrooms, dusting, mopping, putting laundry away, ironing, etc.  I will get to those things, well most of them. Bathrooms are necessary.  Dusting and mopping can be put off until you get to the point that you need to invite company over as a motivator to get these things done. "Honey, the house looks like we need to have company soon."  Yea, yea, don't judge me...

However, there is a project I have been working on this week that is making me feel better, so I thought I'd share.  I know that Christmas is not that far away, so I've been taking the opportunity now to sort toys, clothes, and books to donate.  I've already given several items to friends that can use them, and the rest will be donated.  I try to do this project often, but Christmas is a great motivation, since you know the offspring will be gleaning new items in less than two months.

If your kids are like mine, they have more than they need.  They don't play with half of it, and they probably won't even notice it's missing.  A phrase I say often is, "if I find it laying around, and you haven't been caring for it, then I assume you don't love it and can part with it."  Usually there's whining and pleading, and promises to take good care of it (Dave can be so difficult sometimes...kidding).  After I've said this I might return it to them and give it a little longer.  If I find it tossed in a corner somewhere again, then it's gone.  Currently I'm working through an ugly red plastic cat with my son....he swears he loves this thing.  I swear it's hideous and I keep tripping over it.  We'll see who wins.  I don't get rid of keepsakes, and things I know they love.  But seriously, sometimes you need to invade their room with a garbage bag and a donation box when they're not around, and have all the evidence gone before they get home.  That's just smart parenting, yo!

Anyway, it's time to clean out the junk.  Christmas is coming.  More junk will be acquired.  Give it to someone who might really love it.  Anyone need an ugly red plastic cat?  Stocking stuffer perhaps?

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Someone Had To Say It

Okay, I'm diving really deep today with the topic.  So hang on, and try not to get lost in the intellect of this post.
Minions.  For crying out loud, please stop!!  I can barely handle how much minion memes make me crazy.  Sure, they're cute in the movie Despicable Me, Despicable Me 2, and The Minions.  Sure, they're cute as a costume for Halloween, or a theme for your kiddos birthday party.  I get all of that, and the aforementioned things.  I actually have a child going as a minion this Halloween, so I'm not a total hater.  But, I do not get the Minions as inspirational quotes thing.  I just don't.  It's no secret that I use social media.  However, when every other post involves a meme with a minion I want to shut it all down and pray for our nation.  So, in thinking I'm not the only one to feel this way, I decided to submit a few of the not-so-awesome minion memes as evidence.  Articles A, B, C & D, your honor.     

A.  This minion says it best....actually, minions say things like Bedo, Bedo.

B.  Why?  Why would you ever think this is a good idea?  "Kids, your dad & I need to tell you something.  Nah, never mind, let the minion do it."  Yep, that seems legit. (Praying for our nation)

C.  Inspirational quotes with minions.
I never look at a minion and feel the need to put a poem next to him.  The End.

D.  Your response to this blog post.  Sorry.

Disclaimer:  No minions were harmed in the writing of this post.  If actual feelings were hurt because you love minions and want them everywhere, then I can't help you.  This post reflects my personal feelings, and may or may not reflect the feelings of others.  Perhaps there's a minion meme to best describe your feeling.  I'll pray for you.  

Thursday, October 22, 2015

Do This: You'll Feel Better

I've been brain-storming a series I can work into this blog.  What I've come up with is sort of a self-help section.  I find that there are certain things I do that make me feel better.  Usually they involve cleaning, cooking or some type of domestic chore, and so I'm going to work them into a weekly segment titled "Do This: You'll Feel Better."  Maybe, just maybe, I can inspire you to do them, too.

Here's what kind of suggestions you won't find here:
-  Take a long hot bubble bath with candles, while reading a book and listening to Michael Buble'.  
Let's be real!  I'm a mom with four kids and a husband.  Every best intention that could ever go into taking a long bubble bath is ruined by them needing just "one little thing."  Child bangs on the door, "Dad said not to bother you, but I just really need to know where my green sock is, because I want to wear it in three weeks and I can only find one, and not the other, and if I don't find it tonight we have to go to the mall and find green socks, because I'll just die if I can't have them on the day I want them.  Dad never knows where my stuff is.  Mom.  Are you in there, mom?  I heard a splash.  MOM? Dad, I think mom is drowning!  I'm going to get the key and unlock the door."
Bath Over...I'll revisit this idea in 18 years!  (side note:  My husband is not incompetent.  My children are.  End of story.)  

-  Book an appointment at a salon and have your hair & nails done, and get a massage
Oh my, I wish I could say that this is what you should do.  I would love to do this!  I, on occasion, have had a pedicure.  I get my hair done (like three times a year).  I've had three professional massages my entire life.  But, I can not imagine having them all done in the same day.  Ain't no every-day-mom got the time, or money, for that.  I would bemoan the money I'm spending on this, as it really should go to (insert child's name) new shoes/winter coat/boots/sports uniform, etc., etc.  One day, I will post this. You know, when our budget is limitless, and my friends are in the same boat.  I don't see that changing any time soon, and I don't want different friends.   

Okay, so here's the one big thing I did this week that made me feel better, and it will make you feel better, too.  I cleaned my refrigerator.  That's it.  Maybe this isn't a problem for you.  And, bless you if it isn't - but I probably don't know you, relate to you, or like you.  Keeping the fridge spotless is usually last on my weekly to-do list.  But, I was looking at the crusted milk on the top shelf, and the crumbs settling in comfortably at the bottom of the fridge, and all the other stuff in the middle, and I just couldn't take one more day of living in this type of squalor.  So, right before I needed to start dinner (I like projects, but I may not be good at the timing of these projects) I started pulling everything off the shelves, tossing things that I didn't even know we still had, and wiped, scrubbed and re-arranged everything neatly back in.  A half hour or more past when I probably should have started dinner I had a neat, clean and fresh smelling fridge.  So, pick a day, or make this a project over several days (one shelf at a time), and clean out your fridge.  Don't forget the shelves in the door.  It's amazing what ranch dressing does to that area, and you don't even realize it.  Replace the opened containers of baking soda that you put in there two years ago, because you read somewhere that you were supposed to do that.  Do it all.  I promise, you'll feel better.  I kind of like opening my fridge now and peaking in.  And, just as all well-intended people do, I promise myself that it will never get that bad again.

Clean fridges make me feel better...I promise you will feel better, too.  Who cares if dinner is a little late that night.  Make them stare into the fridge until they praise you for your efforts before you feed them.  It's character building....